Hey, I'm going to disappear
Batman: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
Bruce Wayne: Hey I'm going to disappear for 8 years.
People of Gotham: Shut up Bruce, we're trying to figure out who Batman is.
Batman: I'M BACK!
Bruce Wayne: ME TOO.
People of Gotham: NO ONE CARES BRUCE. WHO THE FUCK IS BATMAN?
nostopdasgay: videohall: This is how I want to live “I had the stupidest grin on the entire length of that video. Also this needs to be some sort of therapy.” This is how i want to die
every start to supernatural season 1 episode ever
dean: (does something)
sam: you shouldn't do that
dean: it's how we were raised
sam: yeah so
dean: do we have a gig
sam: (random location), not far from here
dean: sounds like (demon/spirit/legend)
sam: yeah but what about dad
dean: fuck dad he doesn't come into the picture until the end of the season now stop dreaming about jess and pick a cassette tape we got a thing to kill
demadema: Supernatural / Adventure Time Crossover :) *squee*
thingsonhazelshead: Pomegranate fell off.
Books for Miles
fuckyeahawesomehouses: HEY JO. HEY DENA. You’re welcome. ;) Nnnnng. These should all be rooms in the same house and it should be MY HOUSE.
It offends me both as a librarian and a pervert.– best comment on 50 Shades of Grey that I’ve heard so far (via zarahlee)
How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If...
*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man: I never filled out an application.
Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Man: Fuck you, slut.